What do we say? What do we do? Who do we refer them to?

July 2012
The loss of a loved one is a very traumatic event in a person’s life. The loss of a child is one of the most horrific losses any Mother or Father could ever experience. The pain experienced can best be described by this statement, “He/she hurt so bad that you could see the pain flowing out of them!”

Recently we’ve had a number of people reaching out to us: What do we say? What do we do? Who do we refer them to?

Let’s take these questions one at a time:
· What do we say? “We are so sorry for your loss; we hurt for you and will pray for you.” Please don’t make promises you will not keep.
· What do we do? Be there for them, love them, care for them and listen to them. Do little things for them; send cards, flowers, take them out to eat. But most of all, pray for them!
· Who do we refer them to? HeartBeat is an excellent program offered in many Colorado counties. Let us know and we can direct you to one. This is a group setting made of people who have lost loved ones to suicide. Yes, it helps to talk. They are given skills to cope as well as the fellowship of others who they can walk this long journey with. There are similar programs on a national basis.
o These programs will often know of skilled counselors in your area that can be used. Don’t think they can do it alone!
o Another resource is centerforloss.com. Dr. Wolfelt is one of the leading experts in grieving.
o Some churches have grief groups. The fellowship in these groups can be very helpful.
o Do not expect them to get better! This is a long painful journey, five years later we still hurt and we still grieve.
o Please put them on our Prayer Line. We will have Prayer Warriors praying for them from all over the world.
Links to these resources are on the website under, “Lost a Love One?”

Thank you for being sensitive to the needs of your friends and loved ones. Be sure to walk patiently and lovingly along this journey with them.

God Bless!


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